Season 1 Episode 4 “Battle of the Sexists”

~Outline~
Eric and Donna argue, after she continually defeats him in various sports and games. Jackie pressures Donna to let Eric win, while Hyde and Fez pressure Kelso to stand up to Jackie. Red's job hours at the auto plant are cut back and he is forced to stay home, keeping himself occupied by "fixing" things, much to Kitty's dismay.

~Vocabulary~
○impersonation
Jackie : Do your Chico impersonation.

○Exodus
○Deuteronomy
Eric : You're dreaming. It's like comparing (Red's coming in) Exodus and Deuteronomy both of
which have taught us very valuable lessons.

○crock pot
Kitty : I gotta go hide the crock pot.

○on one's feet
Eric : Forman has the ball. He fakes left. He fakes right. The crowd is on their feet!

○saw
Red : I'm getting the saw.

○wuss
Fez : Yes, but this is America, wuss.

○thigh
○spank
Fez : Michael, rub oil on my thighs while I spank you.

○be going through a rough patch
Kitty : So I gather you and Donna are going through a rough patch.

○stab
Donna : Don't worry about it. Someone will stab Eric. Bye.

○coming down with
Eric : With you? I'd love eto, but I'm kind of tired and my wrist hurts, and I think I'm coming down with the flu.

○forefather
Hyde : Like the spirit of your Mayan forefathers.

○clump
Donna, you sat on my chest and made me eat a clump of dirt.

○reservoir
○skinny-dipping
Jackie : You know what would be a good romantic scene in movie? The night we had by the reservoir when we went skinny-dipping.

~Funny Lines~
Jackie : I'm waiting.
Eric : Forget it.
Hyde : Just say it and she'll go home.
Eric : Fine. You're right, Jackie, the Fonz could beat up Bruce Lee.
Jackie : Thank you. Now, Michael, call me tonight at 8:00.
Kelso : But that's when Chico And The Man is on.
Jackie : I know. But I like it when you describe it to me. Do your Chico impersonation.
Kelso : I don't think these guys really want to hear my...
Eric : Sure we would.
Hyde : Go ahead, Michael. By all means. Please.
Kelso : All right. [Mimicking Freddy Prinze] Looking good!

Eric : Kelso, quick question. Why can't you date someone a little less annoying?
Kelso : Like who?
Eric : What about Barbara Vensen?
Kelso : She's just as annoying as Jackie.
Hyde : Yeah, but her boobs are huge.
Kelso : So?
Hyde : Do you find that annoying?
Kelso : Pam Macy. Now she's got some knockers, baby.
Hyde : True, but they're not bigger than Barbara's.
Kelso : Yeah, they are.
Eric : You're dreaming. It's like comparing (Red's coming in) Exodus and Deuteronomy both of which have taught us very valuable lessons. Hi Dad.

Hyde : Look, the issue isn't, are Pam's big, right? They issue is, are they bigger than Barbara's? Because Barbara's are bigger than (Kitty's coming down) the walls of Jericho, which, as we all kow, came tumbling down, right? Hello, Mrs. Forman.

Kitty : Hi. Eric, did your father come down here?
Eric : Yeah, he's fixing the dryer.
Kitty : Dear. You know ever since the plant cut back his hours, he spends all his time fixing things. Things that don't need fixing, Things I need. Things I use. Things I love. I gotta go hide the crock pot .

Kelso : If he's like this now, he's gonna be a total headcase, if they shut down the plant. He's gonna be this pathetic guy. (Red's opening the door) With breasts the size of watermelons! Is what Moses said to the Egyptians.
Red : Kelso, go home.

Eric : Forman has the ball. He fakes left. He fakes right. The crowd is on their feet !

Kelso : Donna beat you in basketball?
Fez : Is this true, Eric?
Eric : Yeah. What, is that a big deal?
Hyde : Of course not. Unless, Donna happens to be, you know, a girl.
Kelso : Especially a girl you love.
Fez : You know, in my country, if a woman beast you, it makes her want you.
Eric : Really?
Fez : Yes, but this is America, wuss.
Kelso : Wuss, wuss, wuss.
Hyde : Kelso, would you stop that?Wuss wuss wuss.
Eric : Wait. What about Kelso? I mean, Jackie has him totally whipped.
Fez : Whipped like the family pig.
Kelso : I am no pig-whipped. Whre do you even get that stuff.
Hyde : Are you kidding? Michael, call me at 8:00.
Eric : Michael, do you Chico impression.
Fez : Michael, rub oil on my thighs while I spank you. Please, someone else talk now.

Bob : Midge, this table is a little wobbly. Stick some sugar packets under it, will you?

Midge : Honey, I think your annoyinng friend is right.

Midge : Honey. Men don't control the world.
Bob : Okay, I'll see you later.
Midge : Honey, could you open this jar for me?
Bob : Sure thing, pudding.
Midge : I'm so lucky to have my big, strong grizzly bear around.
Donna : First of all yuck. Second, things don't even work like that anymore. That's what the Equal Rights Amendment is for.
Midge : That's good dear. You stick to your principles. And 40 years from now, you can tell all your cats how you won a basketball game.

Jackie : Skey, she was going like, "That is so gross!" And I went like, "It takes one to know one!" And she was like, "No." and I went , "Yeah."
Kelso : Aha.
Hyde : Man, are you still on the phone? Come one, let's go.
Kelso : I can't.
Hyde : The movie starst in five minutes. Let's go.
Kelso : I can't.
Hyde : Wuss.
Kelso : Jackie, hold on. Okay, I'll tell her there's an emergency and I gotta go. She'll buy that, right?
Hyde : Yeah, except for one thing. (Hyde indicatings Kelso's hiding the wrong part)

Donna : Have you been practicing? My goodness, what a super shot.
Eric : Donna, what are you doing?
Donna: I'm losing to you, you big, strong grizzly bear.

Kitty : Your father's fixing my refrigerator!

Hyde : You could, and I know this is a ridical suggestion, be a man?
Kelso : You're right man. No more excuses.
Fez : She will crush him, yes?
Hyde : Like the spirit of your Mayan forefathers
Fez : My forefathers were not Mayan.
Hyde : Like anyone cares.
Jackie : So Michael.
Kelso : So Jackie. I didn't mean to make you hang up on me. I'm sorry. It will never happen again.

Hyde : I'm sorry. I remember saying, be a man, not be a wuss.
Fez : I am ahamed to know you.

Donna : Hey, remember when we were eight and I beat you at wrestling? That was fun.
Eric : Donna, you sat on my chest and made me eat a clump of dirt.
Red : That was pretty sad, Eric.
Eric : What?
Red : Come on, I'm going to teach you how to play backetball. We got four hours untill your bedtime and we are gonna drill and drill.
Eric : But I thought that Mom needed your help.
Kitty : I can't hear you, Eric, I'm ironing. Lalala~
Red : We'll start you off with 100 squat thrusts.

Jackie : So Barbra Streisand became this huge star, right? But Kris Kristofferson could not take it anymore. so he drinks and crashes his car. Isn't that romantic?
Fez : Say, Yes, it is.
Kelso : "Yes, it is."
Jackie : I just love romantic movies, don't you?
Fez : Yes, I do.
Kelso : "Yes, I do."
Jackie : You know what would be a good romantic scene in movie? The night we had by the reservoir when we went skinny-dipping. Remember?
Fez : No, describe it to me.
Kelso : "No, describe it to me."
Jackie : Michael, you're so bad. Okay, the water was really cold. So I dove in, well you know.
Fez : "No I don't know."
Jackie : "Michael!"

Well, considering how Jackie behaved in the late seasons, Jackie in this first season looks super annoying lol

Season 1 Episode 3 “Streaking”

~Outline~
The guys decide to streak when President Gerald Ford comes to town for a campaign stop. The town committee chooses Red to ask the President a question and Donna refuses to wear an American flag jumpsuit her father, Bob, gives her.

~Vocabulary~
○dehydrate
Jackie : I am so dehydrated.

○whistle-stop
Jackie : Because we are a whistle-stop along his Wisconsin campaign trail .

○keister
Red : It's not like he's coming to our house, and if he did, I'd kick him in the keister.

○shenanigan
Principal : So no shenanigans, you hear me?

○rally
Jackie's father : Now, the most important part of our presidential rally is the townspeople "Q" and "A" section.

○torch
Fez : Will people be chasing us with torches and pointy sticks?

○fuzz
Hyde : "I hate the fuzz" on my ass.

○snazzy
Bob : Pretty snazzy?

○asinine
Red : This is asinine.

○hound
Kelso : I'm itching to release the hound here.

○queer
Donna : My Dad's gonna make me wear this really queer jumpsuit.

○gout
Kitty : Sixteen years later, she got the gout and died.

○streaker
Fez : I bet he's a streaker, too.

○shucks
Eric : Shucks

~Funny Lines~
Eric : Here. Piggly-Wiggly Diet Creme Soda.
Jackie : I told you my top three choices were Tab, Fresca, or Diete Rite.
Eric : Again, you get Piggly-Wiggly Diet Creme Soda.
Jackie : Thenn I'll just have water.
Donna : You know, there's a hose in the backyard.

Kitty : The President of these United States, Gerald R. Ford, the 36th... 40th? I don't know. He's the President.

Red : Eric, say that your job was sent to a plant Guatela-who-the-hell-cares. Now, are you gonna vote for the guy that let that happen?
Kitty :Red, President Ford didn't take your job. he took Nixon's.
Red : Eric, we're waiting.
Eric : Well, I believe that everyone's political opinion is valid and worth hearing.
Red : That's perfect, Eric. Use that line when you run for Miss America.

Jackie's father : Now, look, we're talking about adult stuff here. Why don't you and your friend head up to your room? Now, the most important part of our presidential rally is the townspeople "Q" and "A" section.
Bob : Just so, everyone's clear. The "Q" stands for "Question", the "A" for "Answer." All yours, Jack.

Eric : but I think my dad might kill me, and I'm anti-being killed.

Donna : You're gonna look like a bunch of idiots.
Kelso : A bunch of naked idiots.

Red : They took my job, my stability, now they want to take away my right of free speech
Kitty : You still have the Toyota, it gets great mileage.
Red : Where is the America that I knew as a boy? Where? You tell me, dear God, where?
Eric : Okay, I really hate being in this room right now.

Eric : Did you write, "I hate the fuzz" on your butt?
Hyde : Yeah. Donna, here's your lipstick back.
Donna : Keep it.

Kelso : Hey, you hitting on my girlfriend?
Jackie : Michael, he's not.
Man : Hey, man. You wanna go? Come on.
Kelso : Yeah, let's go,, cowboy... You are so lucky I'm naked, pal.

Midge : There's supposed to be a blue field of stars there.

Kelso : There's another guy in a trench coat.
Fez : I bet he's a streaker, too.
Eric : No Fez, he's with Secret Service.
Fez : How about that man?
Eric : Yeah, Secret Service.
Fez : And that man?
Everybody : Yeah.
Fez : And that man with the dog?
Eric : Yeah.
Fez : The dog is looking at us. Come here, boy.
Eric : No Fez!
Hyde : Oh, man, I just thought of something.
Everybody : What?
Hyde : What are we going to do with our trench coats?I mean, after we rip them off, we can't come back here and get them.
Eric : Shucks
Hyde : God, this is all my fault. You know what? I'll hold the coats. You guys streak.
Kelso : I just thought of something, too. We're naked, and there's a lot of dogs here. Maybe we should just sit down.
Hyde : I'm in.
Eric : Me, too.
Fez : Me, too.

Donna : Are you gonna streak?
Eric : No, we took a vote and it's unanimous. We're all very chicken.
Donna : That's too bad. It's been a while since I've seen you naked.
Eric : You've never seen me naked.
Donna : Like a zillion times. When we were kids, you were always running around the neighborhood naked, screaming, "Wee, wee! Pee, pee!"

Red : Good night.
Eric : Good night, Red.
Red : And next time, don't wear black socks. You looked like an ass.

I was kinda surprised that I could understand most of the episode without knowing many words when I watched this first time. (I didn't look up words when I watched it first time unlike this time.) This work, writing down lots of lines are tiresome, but the show's so good for me not to feel tired!

Season 1 Episode 2 “Eric's Birthday”

~Outline~
Eric's 17th birthday is approaching, and he tries to prevent his mother, Kitty, from throwing him a surprise birthday party. Donna tells Jackie she kissed Eric, and Jackie helps her choose a meaningful gift for him. Meanwhile, Eric's older sister, Laurie, returns home from college for a visit.

~Vocabulary~
○compatible
Red : Parts have to be compatible, Eric.

○frosting
Kitty : Get a large can of frosting.

○fallopian tube
Eric : First the egg travels down the fallopian tube to the uterus where it attaches to the wall.

○bandy
Kitty : I just don't like my little boy bandying those words about.

○bump
Red : Yeah, and if a frog had wings, he wouldn't bump his ass when he hops.

○sorely
Kitty : So don't think you're getting one or you will be sorely disappointed.

○lawn
Red : Happy Birthday. You know, the lawn's not gonna cut itself.

○bun
○dill
Kitty : We have more buns and sweet pickles if you don't like the dill.

○Yahtzee
Midge : Bob is very good at Yahtzee.

~Funny Lines~
Donna : It’s still three naked women with a dog.
Fez : I want to be the Hooterville dog.

Hyde : She's not a goddess. She's more the earth mother whore type, which works for me.

Laurie : It'll only take me a minute.
Eric : I don't think Kelso's gonna last that long.

Eric : But I need a favor.
Laurie : For you? I don't think so.

Kelso : Your sister wants me. I mean you saw her coming on to me, right?
Hyde : Let him go.
Kelso : Remember? I said, "Hello, Laurie." And Laurie said... "Hello, Kelso."
Laurie hallucinated by Kelso : I'm waiting and I want you. Baby. Take me now. I need it bad. I need it all night. I'm completely naked under this. And I'm hot for you, Kelso.
Kelso : What? You didn't see it?

Red : So how's your friend Janice?
Laurie : Pregnant.
Kitty : She was such a nice girl. How does that happen?
Eric : First the egg travels down the fallopian tube to the uterus where it attaches to the wall.
Red : Eric, for God's sakes, that's no language for a woman to hear.

Eric : Laurie, I just remembered. I can't loan you the Vista Cruiser on account of I hate you.
Red : Laurie, you're not driving the Vista Cruiser. It's old and undependable. It could break down and you'd be at the mercy of any maniac who came along. It's okay for Eric, but you're taking the Toyota. And here's $20.
Laurie : Will that cover gas?
Kitty : It should. Honey, give her another $10, just in case.
Eric : You know, I could probably use some gas money.
Red : Yeah, and if a frog had wings, he wouldn't bump his ass when he hops.

Eric : Donna? Donna, it's 3 a.m. Are you crazy?
Donna hallucinated by Eric : Crazy? Crazy in love with you. What is i about you that drives me wild with passion and desire?
Eric : I am 17 now.
Donna hallucinated by Eric : Shut up and sit down. I have to give you your birthday present. It can't wait any longer. Close your eyes.
Eric : This is my birthday present?
Donna hallucinated by Eric : No, that's my nightgown. I'm your present. Open your eyes, birthday boy.
Kitty : Suprise!

Red : Happy Birthday. You know, the lawn's not gonna cut itself.

Kitty : Hi, kids. I need your help with something. Jackie, Donna, Michael, Steven, young man with an accent, could you give me a hand? Not you Eric!

Eric : Wow! I mean, Yeah.
Kitty : It's an eight-track tape player.
Eric : Cassettes. Great. Thanks, Hyde.
Hyde : You're welcome.
Kitty : Let's put them in the eight-track and play them.

Laurie : Okay, I'd love to stay, but I'm leaving.
Eric : Buy us some beer? We'll pay double.
Laurie : Do you really think that beer will make your little party better?
Everybody : Yes.
Laurie : I admit it would give some young people a sense of maturity but it would be a false maturity, and that would be wrong.
Eric : So you're not going to do it?
Laurie : Of course not. Now I'm going off to jin my legal friends at a party with a keg. Bye.
Kelso : So, Laurie, where's the party? You know, maybe we'll cruise by later.
Laurie : In your dreams, you idiot.
Kelso : Okay, you guys had to see that.

Kitty : The liquor cabinet?
Red : It's locked.
Kitty : What if there's an emergency?
Red : They'll call.
Kitty : What if they run out of chips?
Red : They'll starve.

Kitty : Well, planty could happen. Plenty.
Kitty as Donna : Now that the adults are gone, we can be as bad as we want.
Kitty as Jackie : Who wants to give Eric a venereal disease?
Kitty as Kelso : Hey look. Coasters. Forget coasters!
Kitty as Eric : Please, fellas... My mom put out coasters for a reason.
Kitty as Hyde : I think I'm gonna put my drink directly on the furniture. That way it will leave a ring.
Kitty as Eric : No! Why didn't I beg my mother to stay?
Kitty as Fez : Quiet, you silly American! I am making a long distance call on your parents' phone.
Kitty as Eric : But that's immoral.
Kitty as Fez : In my country of, wherever it is I am from, I can never tell. Morals get in the way of a good dirty time. But first, I need to eat some chips. What? Out of chips? Now I am mad. I must shoot something.
Kitty as Eric : Not the littlest hobo! Why?
Red : You're over-reacting.

Kitty : Look at this. We never thought to put a candle out here. It is just so romantic.
Red : Let's keep moving. There's nothin to see out here.
Kitty : We have candles in the bedroom, don't we?

Hyde : Come on, Forman, go for it.
Eric : The door's open, we can hear you. We can see you.
Fez : Is he kissing her?
Hyde : None of us can see them. Fez.
Fez : Eric are you kissing her?

Kelsoキタ━━━(゜∀゜)━━━!! I think he hallucinates as much as I do! I wanted to appear in the show, but apparently I'm not called. Probably becuase I'm the same as Kelso except I'm cooler than him a little bit or a lot:P

Season 1 Episode 1 “That '70s Pilot”

~Outline~
In the first episode, Red Forman and his wife Kitty hands the keys to the Vista Cruiser to their son, Eric, to use. Through persuasion from his friends, Eric uses the car to get out of town for a Todd Rundgren concert in Milwaukee with his closest friends: Donna, Hyde, and Kelso. Eric also decides to invite the new foreign kid from school named Fez. Kelso's girlfriend Jackie invites herself along, and Eric is uncomfortable around Donna when Kelso inadvertently tells Eric that Donna likes him.

~Vocabulary~
○versatile
Kitty : I know. I know. Vienna sausages are so versatile.

○groovy
Midge : So, Eric, how do you like Bob’s new hair? Isn’t it groovy?

○darn
Donna : They’re so darn cute.

○frisky
Eric : They’re so frisky.

○hippety-hop
Eric : Really? And there I was all day long on the hippity-hop.

○downhill
Eric : So it’s all downhill from here, sir?

○scar
Eric : When I ride the bus in my nurse’s uniform, people always show me their scars.

○drop into one’s lap
Eric : We didn’t say that. Things don’t just drop into your lap, Eric.

○fluid
Red : Oil changes, road flares, fluids, that’s your job.

○attic
Red : Clean the attic.

○spin
Red : Taking it for a spin, right?

○pull out of the fire
Hyde as Jackie’s father : Speaking of kids, wasn’t it lucky Triple-A pulled Eric’s butt out of the fire when he took the car to Milwaukee without your permission?

○chump out
Kelso : You guys are chumping me out.

○disobedience
Eric : You know, it’s amazing what one act of civil disobedience can do for you.

~Funny Lines~
Red : His head looks like a poodle’s ass.
Eric : A poodle’s ass walks into your party.
Red : Eric, don’t use the “ass” word. You’re still in high school.

Hyde : Check it out.
Kelso : Wow
Donna : I see that every day.

Jackie : You don’t want me to go to the concert. Is that it?
Kelso : I didn’t know if you liked music.

Jackie : We can have fun at the concert, too. Especially in the car on the way back.
Kelso : Okay. You can go.

Eric : I want you so bad.
Donna : Eric, it’s a car.
Kelso : Let’s just leave these two kids alone.

Fez : I may not say this right because I am new to English. But she has tremendous breasts, yes?

Fez : I, too, must go to the bathroom. Eric?
Eric : No, it doesn’t work that way with guys.

Hyde : So is Red still thinking about giving you the car maybe?
Kelso : Even if we do get it, we’re gonna need some serious gas money… ‘cause the cruiser’s a boat.
Eric: I know it’s a boat. This whole gas shortage bites.
Fez : Who is getting a boat?
Kelso: Hey, Jackie’s good for gas money.
Eric : You’re such a whore.
Fez : When does the boat get here, whore?

Kitty : Laurie’s friend got pregnant in a car. Don’t let that happen.
Red : If I find one beer can in that car, it’s over.

Eric : Bitching.
Red : Eric, not in front of your mother.
Eric : Thank you, pop… Sir.


Eric : I guess that’s that. We’re not going.
Donna : Eric, do you wanna go?
Eric : He said no trips out of town.
Donna : It’s your car. Do you wanna go?
Eric : But he’s God.

Kitty : The kids are off. I wonder where they’re going.
Red : Out of town.
Kitty : Are you sure?.
Red : Of course. I told them not to.

Hyde : Jackie, parents talk to each other about how we screw up.

Hyde as Jackie’s father : Speaking of kids, wasn’t it lucky Triple-A pulled Eric’s butt out of the fire when he took the car to Milwaukee without your permission?
Eric as Red : What? Why, that twisted little monkey! I’m grounding him for 10 years.


Eric : Are they cheap? Or possibly free?
Randy : $32, minimum.
Kelso : All right. I’ll tell you what. We’ll trade you our battery, plus $5 for one of your batteries.
Randy : That’s a really sweet deal, my friend, but how about this? How about one battery for two concert tickets.
Hyde : We can’t give up two tickets.
Randy : Okay.
Eric : It’s either that or none of us go.
Kelso : So who’s out?
Hyde : Well, there’s always Jackie.
Kelso : Of course, Jackie. I mean, Jackie’s gone. But who else?
Eric : I don’t know. Jackie’s date?

Kelso : You guys are chumping me out.
Eric : I’ve had to listen to her for a good hour.
Fez : A really long hour.

Fez : How can you say God hates you? At least you have a woman’s love. Be happy, whore.

Fez : Hey guys. Randy’s date is a man.
Randy : I have to go to the bathroom, Kevin?
Eric : I’ll explain later.
Jackie : You were so nice to give your ticket away, so you could be with me.
Kelso : Well, Yeah.

Eric : We could go to Canada. We got a new battery, what’s stopping us?
Donna : You know, I think Canada closes at 9:30.

So this is the second time to watch the best sitcom in the world. I laughed and grinned as much as I did when I saw this show first time. My two favorite characters Kelso and Fez are shining in the show anyway!